HOW EXPENSIVE SHOULD THE ENGAGEMENT RING BE?

Last year ended with a bevy of proposals and engagements. Close friends, people on social media, everywhere, there was a beehive of celebrations as couple’s “took an arrow to the knee”. Pictures of such happy moments were shared far and near. Gleaming rings ranging from some with some serious diamond rock nestled on a gorgeous base and some not so glamorous ones. With all photos however, the beaming brides-to-be stood beside dashing men who “had put a ring on it”, unperturbed and smiling happily. 

This sparked a conversation between my friends and I. My question was “how expensive must the engagement ring be to make a lady happy?” Mama thought the ring has to show that her man put some thought, effort and investment into picking it out and that was non-negotiable. Milah on the other hand was more interested in an elaborate proposal. Something out of the ordinary, that will blow her mind away. As for the ring, it just should be something decent. 

However, Mimes, the ever straight shooter and cynic was of the opinion that she didn’t much care about the extravagant proposal, what mattered to her most was the quality of the ring. “What’s the essence of a lavish over-the-top proposal when the value of the ring he gives doesn’t measure to the cost of the choice shoe in my wardrobe?”

Though all made viable points, this brings to mind something I came across a few years ago. It said “the unwritten law is for the engagement ring to cost at least the value of the man’s 3 month salary”. I posted that statement on my twitter page, and I remember having a massive outcry from guys. They thought it was too exorbitant for any man to invest that much in an engagement ring.

One guy took it so personal that he hypothetically asked that if we were dating and he got me a ring worth 600k (which was the equivalent of his 3 months’ pay), would I take it? I told him I didn’t see a reason why not. In his opinion, he figures that though an engagement ring should be worth something reasonable, it need not be so high. Another guy categorically stated that as he is, he doesn’t see why he would buy his woman an unnecessarily expensive engagement ring. He added that if he gave his woman a ring worth 10,000 naira, she should count herself lucky.

Let me share something with you about the economic and emotional benefit of engagement rings. It isn’t just a mere accessory. It is, just like all precious stones, an investment. That is why there is an advice that you invest in a good ring, because you can re-sell when the need arises. And for those who worry about it getting stolen or lost, well, sir, you can insure your woman’s ring just as with all other valuables. Another thing that most people don’t put into consideration is the emotional and personal reason that guides the purchase of an engagement ring.

An engagement ring isn’t a mere accessory that says “I liked it and I put a ring on it” or to conceitedly say “oh yes, I have hooked this guy”. It is more than that. It is should be a well thought-out present specially picked out and given by a man to the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with. It is a personal gift to the woman of your dreams, to show much you value her. It is hers to keep, to look at every day and feel cherished and loved. How do you think your woman will feel when you go down on one knee to propose with a 5,500 naira ring? It’s not even as expensive as the palm slippers you wear on Saturday. Or God forbid that it be as expensive as your Rolex watch that you bought on your last holiday and can’t help flashing it in every photo?!

 

This brings me to the conclusion, that though not everyman can afford to get a 2 carat diamond and above as an engagement ring, pick something out that is within your financial power that shows you invested time and resources into it. Hence the analogy that asks for about your 3 months’ salary. 

This however is not cast in stone; it is only a suggestion. So while there is no need breaking the bank just to get your woman an expensive ring, you should invest a considerable amount that shows you care to give her something that costs you something. And as for the ladies, do appreciate whatever ring your man can afford to buy for you. After all, that he has taken such a leap at a hopeful future with you should be what matters the most shouldn’t it?

Peace…