Note for readers.
Hello my lovelies, it has been eons since i posted here. While i
apologise for that break, i want you all to know that i had not for a second
forgotten about you; i had just been preoccupied with other things. I wrote
many articles but stashed them in a folder and never got around to posting, so
this is one of many articles that were just lying idle. I wrote this some months
back and going through it right now, i found it so hilarious that i had to share. Please
read, comment and contribute your opinion on this.
Bless up,
Jemimah-Nikky Jates
1.
You cannot get jealous when you see
her with another man. You haven’t earned that right. Make her main chick and
then, only then can you enjoy such privilege. Yup, that’s a privilege.
2.
You cannot ask her to cook for you.
Only main dudes get to eat that special jollof rice.
3.
You cannot go through her phone.
What did you keep there that you are looking for? Whether accidentally or
purposefully, Nope you cannot.
4.
You cannot answer her calls in her
absence.
5.
You cannot show up at her house
unannounced. What were you expecting? That she will stay home, in ragged sweats
and undone hair pining after you?
6.
You cannot ask her to help wash
your clothes. Nope nope nope. Get a laundry man or please wait for madam to come
and let her wash it for you.
7.
You have to spend on her. Why else
is she with you? You won’t make her official chick and you still won’t spend on
her? Dem follow you from village abi na craze dey worry you? Spend spend spend.
At least if she can’t unburden her heart to you, she can splurge on a new purse
that will take her mind off.
8.
You dare not call or refer to her
as a gold digger. If she is a gold digger what does that make you? Mr. I want to
burn my candle at both ends?
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