20 Things Men look for in an ideal girlfriend/potential spouse?

Letter: From Blogger

It’s Friday! And I’m sure most of us are in high spirit preparing for the weekend. Well I want to further add to your excitement…. It is my pleasure to inform you my esteemed readers and followers that “Jemimah-Nikky Jates Blog” is diversifying. And to better bring to your computer/mobile device screens the best of fun stories, this blog will be featuring stories from other writers. 

So let me introduce you all to our featured writer Austin .U, with his very first story for this blog. This story is an off-shoot of his observation of relationships between men and women over time and he has come up with answers to the question most women ask; What do men really want in women? 

To whet your appetites and to maintain suspense, I will publish the second edition of this story next week. Please read up and thank me later *winks*.

20 Things Men look for in an ideal girlfriend/potential spouse?

By Austin - Freelance writer and fashion stylist

A lot of women think that quality and emotionally stable men do not exist. Believe it or not, they do and they aren’t looking for the all-too-perfect woman, supermodel, or the girl next door with gigantic boobs and ass, but for an ideal match; a woman who is down to earth, not selfish, sweet and sensitive to his needs and understands how he thinks and acts. In line with that thinking towards women, men want a woman who…

1.      Is Confident and Secure.

There’s nothing more attractive and sexy to a man than a woman who is confident, secure and feels perfect in her own skin and believes in herself. This type of woman has done her inner work and feels really cool about who she is. She’s probably looked in the mirror several times and loves what she sees each time, without seeking a man’s approval to know if she looks good. She does not have to be rich and famous or gorgeous, but she does have to live her life from a place of meaning and purpose. She is the type of woman that hasn’t waited around for so long for a prince charming to come and rescue her and build a life for her. Instead, like a diva, she creates her own world and rules it. When the right man comes around, she tries to merge their worlds without giving up everything she’s created. This means that she does not drop her friends, family, and life’s purpose simply to become part of a man’s world.

2.      Knows What She Wants.

When a woman knows what she wants, it is evident even in the way she expresses herself. Men are attracted to this because they know upfront if she is a contender or a pushover. This kind of woman does not waste time with situations or people that doesn’t fit in into her perception of what is ideal. When a man encounters a woman who appears not to know what she wants, it signals to him that she does not know her worth, and may end up not wanting her in a few days, weeks, months, or years.

3.      Can Communicate Effectively

Communication is the most essential part of any relationship. This applies to both verbal and non-verbal communication. Men are not active communicators; hence it’s only natural for them to want a woman who speaks to them in a concise, comprehensive and straightforward manner when it comes to expressing her needs. A lot of women live under the assumption that men already know their needs even without communicating it to them effectively. Men like it when a woman tells them what they want and how best it can be delivered. His goal is to make her happy, and when he has the information on how to accomplish that, he feels confident that he can do it. A woman should have a good command of language. No man likes his ideal woman to embarrass him in public with her poor grammatical expressions.

4.      Is Intelligent.

Acting like a bitch may be appealing to boys, but not men; know the difference. What real men want in their ideal woman is a woman who is smart and can stand as their equal. Not just the beauty, but a brain to back it up. Intelligence is a total turn on for men. Like the saying goes “Show me the woman you’re with and I will tell you the man you are”. No man wants a woman by him who is perceived as dumb because that would rub off on his personality. When a man meets a woman, he first assesses her level of intelligence. Take it or leave it, most men die before their wives; hence we have a record of more widows than widowers. Every man craves for an intelligent woman who can stand for him both in his business and the family when he is no more.   

5.      Is Not Bossy.

Most guys do not and will not welcome the idea of having two Bosses; the official Boss at his work place and the woman in his life. Ironically, when a man first meets a bossy woman, he might think this character trait cute, for a while. However once he starts to feel like he is in a grammar school and being told what to do, and what not to by his second grade teacher, he will have no choice left but give his woman her own walking papers.

6.      Understands Him And Doesn’t Want To Change Him

Men are most leery of women who lurk everywhere, trying to change and not accept them the way they are. Most women claim to love a guy just the way he is, but little by little she chips away just about everything about him. First his wardrobe, his choice of music, his hobbies and most importantly his friends. Most times women tend to forget so fast that a man’s friends formed part of who he is before she met him. She shouldn’t expect him to just push them over just because of her presence in his life. Never forget that those times when the moods are not right and she’s not available, those same old friends always got his back. 

7.      Is Playful.

Men like women who do not take everything too seriously and can laugh at their jokes. Playful women have no time to nag. They joke often and this is what breeds happiness in a relationship. Men love to play and would love a woman whom they can be themselves with, a woman who expresses her playfulness and sense of humor without fear of being judged. There is a child in everyman wishing to be set loose, and it feels best having such moments with someone they are attracted to. Every man wants a woman who they can play with and make them laugh sometimes… and guess what? Laughter is the best aphrodisiac a woman can offer a man.

8.      Is Not Suspiciously Jealous.

Men look for women who are not suspiciously jealous, nosy and on the edge at all times because she is very distrusting. Most women have been burnt in a past relationship; so they are on guard for anything that feels wrong. When a man first meets this kind of woman, he sees her as a damsel in distress and wants to reassure her that he is nothing like that guy in her past. However, once she accuses him one too many times because of her suspicions, he will have no choice but to leave her because he can’t go through his life being persecuted for somebody else’s crimes.

9.      Respects Him

A man wants a woman who is able to make him feel like he is the man that he is and even better. He wants her to respect him for who he is, not what he does, or how much money he has. Men who are emotionally healthy and financially stable do not want women who are controlling, self opinionated or bossy. They want a woman who respects their place as the man in the relationship, a woman who will treat them with respect and love.

10.  Is Honest

Men just like women need someone they can trust. If a man doesn’t trust a woman, he is definitely going to keep a lot away from her. Trust is earned. A woman who gives her man reasons to trust her is a Never-Let-Go for any man, every man sees her as a potential spouse. Men like and look out for a woman who keeps things open and honest, and does not tell white lies as little as a text message from an old guy friend. Once a man knows he can trust a woman, he lets her in into every aspect of his life.

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Hope you enjoyed your read. Check this blog next week for continuation on this piece.

If you think you write well and would love to see your features, articles or stories published in this blog, please contact me via  jtjemimah98@yahoo.com and let’s discuss.

Thank you all for the support. God bless.